Hear You Me
by kc creation
Summary: Over a year later, Haru still visits the grave. kyoxharu


**Hear You Me**

_'And if you were with me tonight, I'd sing to you just one more time._

_A song for a heart so big, God couldn't let it live.'_

_- 'Hear You Me' by Jimmy Eat World_

Standing alone, and ignoring the whispers that were almost inaudible in the wind, Haru ran a match sharply over the side of his pants, smirking in satisfaction as it caught fire, and lifting it to the cigarette that hung loosely from his mouth. Kyo always hated it when he smoked. He said it was as if he was wishing his life away for one little moment of pleasure, and Haru had always silently disagreed.

"This one's for you, kitten."

He spoke suddenly, raising the slowly shrinking thing in his hand, arousing even more whispers as he grinned sadly down at the year-old headstone. With all the cracks and imperfections, one would be lead to believe that it was an ancient old thing, but as the ox mused with a dismal intake of breath, even in death the cat would be ridiculed and punished for all the pains the Sohma family was forced to endure.

The funny part of the entire ordeal, however, seemed to be how none of the _zodiac_ hated the feline. Each and every one of them payed their respects to the orange haired boy as he lay inside the closed casket. Along with a sobbing Tohru and mentally lost looking Kazuma, they were the ones who had smiled at him with honest pain in their eyes, and patted his back as he held down his own tears.

A man though, who he hadn't remembered ever seeing around the Sohma complex, had approached him with a mad glow in his eyes, grabbing his shoulder tightly and forcing him to stare down into his anger stricken face.

"He deserved every fucking second of it!"

His words were slurred, and his dark hair was plastered to his greasy face with sweat, but Haru hadn't much time to pay attention to the way he looked, because the man just kept ranting, and more people that he'd never known, or even met before, were nodding in agreement. He wasn't sure, but he must have asked why in the world Kyo deserved his life stolen from him, because the man's voice became more ragged, and the ox wondered if he knew how ignorant he sounded.

"Because of that monster, my wife had a miscarriage! All he brought to the world was misery, and we're all better off without him!"

Haru was going to ask the drunk _how in the hell_ the cat was directly responsible for something like a miscarriage, and kindly request that he leave the funeral in peace, but somehow, Shigure and Yuki ended up holding his black side back as he wailed indignantly at the drunken man, who held his bloody nose and swollen cheek, from the ground, where he was fearfully attempting to scoot away from the crazed nineteen year old.

But that had been over a year ago, and true to his word, Haru hadn't seen the man since. The breeze picked up, and he felt a warmth take over his being. The familiar scent of his long lost lover filled his lungs, and he choked on the smoke of his cigarette. The trees seemed to be whispering his name, in that oh-so familiar voice that he had longed to hear for over a year. He could almost see him, scowl on his face, growling that Haru shouldn't be smoking one of those stupid cancer sticks, and to get on with his goddamn life.

"You can feel him, can't you?"

A voice spoke gently from behind him, and he turned to see Yuki making his way toward the marred stone, before kneeling to place an incense in front of it, lighting it, then moving back to sit, staring silently as the smoke rose into the air.

Dropping his cigarette, and making sure it was completely out, Haru bent his knees and sat by the thoughtful-looking rat.

"That's disrespectful, you know."

The older boy joked, motioning toward the mess he'd just made in the grass, and Haru shrugged, letting a small smile play across his face.

"He won't mind."

The rat laughed, placing his hand on the ox's shoulder in comfort for both himself and the younger boy. Most of the crowd had left by now, and thankfully, whomever was left hadn't bothered to stare at the two cursed boys as the others had earlier.

"Tohru's pregnant."

Yuki moved his hand from his black and white haired cousin, and said cousin almost grinned at the good news. He pulled another cigarette from his pocket, lighting it, and taking a long drag, waiting for the twenty-one year old to carry on.

"She keeps telling me that she hopes it's the cat."

Now Haru _did_ grin at this, imagining the ditzy girl praying every night that her baby would be the cursed outcast, just so she could shower him with the love and affection none of the others ever had the luxury of experiencing.

The wind picked up again, and Haru rubbed his fingers lightly over his knee, gazing with unfocused eyes at the incense, its light, lavender scent calming his thoughts. His breath tasted of nicotine, which only served to remind him just how much Kyo hated the drug. If he caught the ox smoking, he would refuse to kiss him for hours, sometimes even after he'd brushed his teeth. He wondered if the older boy had just been trying to break him of the habit, and he realized, for the most part it had worked. He took another drag.

This was his first new pack since the funeral.

"..Haru."

Yuki muttered nervously after some time had passed.

"You need to start thinking about moving on someday."

If it had been the first time the rat had said this, Haru may have been appalled, but it wasn't, and he opted to smirk sadly, flicking the ashes from his cigarette into the dirt.

He felt like saying that he couldn't; Kyo was his favorite person. For three years, the cat had been his reason to live, and suddenly, just because some drunken fool thought he was fit to drive.. _Suddenly_, he was alone.

The incense was now a small stick, smoking feebly in the strong wind, seemingly determined to survive no matter what. It reminded him of Kyo, like many other things, and just like the cat, the last light eventually went out, and the smoke stopped rising. Just like Kyo, it couldn't be helped.

A lump formed in his throat, and he sucked the last of his cigarette, letting it join the one before it, smashed into the ground. He'd been lying when he said the cat wouldn't mind. He would hate him for picking up smoking again. Kyo had always been so afraid of losing him.

It had all been in vain, because now, more than ever, he wished he was dead.

He rose, brushing the dirt and ashes from his pants, and leaving Yuki to stare regretfully at the headstone.

The rat let him go.

_'On sleepless roads the sleepless go._

_May angels lead you in.'_

_fin._

--

a very popular boy, who went to my school, died this week. I didn't know him, but many of my friends did. The air is always so heavy on days like this.


End file.
